


I Am Groot

by livsagna



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Thor (Movies)
Genre: I Am Groot, Loki stabs Thor, but takes place when Thor and Loki are children, so there's not really any spoilers, this is based off a line in Infinity War
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-01
Updated: 2018-05-01
Packaged: 2019-04-29 01:30:10
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 806
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14462208
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/livsagna/pseuds/livsagna
Summary: When Thor is taking an elective in Groot, what will it take to get Loki to snap?(Based off a line in Avengers: Infinity War where Thor says he took an elective in speaking Groot. No spoilers other than that.)





	I Am Groot

"I am Groot," Thor muttered to himself for the fifty-seventh time in two minutes. "I am Groot. I am Groot. I am Groot?" That wouldn't be too bothersome, except Thor was confined to the bedroom he and Loki shared because he annoyed his mother with his Grooting, and Loki was also stuck there as punishment for—you guessed it—stabbing Thor. Kind of an odd punishment to be stuck in a room with Thor. Thor, who was muttering, "I am Groot," again and again and again. 

"Will you shut up?" Loki finally spoke. He had been reading a book on the history of Muspellheim, which was quite boring, but it was better than listening to Thor blathering on about being a Groot. Of course, enough is sometimes enough, which was why the younger Odinson finally snapped. 

"I am Groot," Thor said. He meant _no_ , of course, but Loki didn't know that. 

"No, you are Thor," Loki said exasperatedly, throwing his book at Thor. It was a rather large book, and hardcover, and it hit Thor square in the nose. 

Thor yelled, "Ow!" 

Well, that's better than 'I am Groot'. Loki picked up a new book and began reading. He traced his fingers over an illustration of Yggdrasil, almost losing himself in the pages, when—

"I am Groot." 

Loki tried a new approach. "I am Loki." 

Thor grinned far too wide. "I am Groot." 

"I am Loki." 

"I. Am. _Groot_!"

Loki was confused. He took a deep breath and began to ramble, seeing if he could fix Thor. "I am Loki, son of Odin, rightful heir to the throne of Asga—"

"I AM GROOT," Thor thundered. 

"Brother, do shut up," Loki pleaded. 

Thor frowned at him. "I am Groot." 

"No, you are Thor," Loki said. "See, I told you taking this class would be a bad idea. I saw this coming." 

Thor sighed. "I am Groo—Wait, no." He looked over his textbook, changing his inflection slightly. "I am Groot." 

"I hate you," Loki muttered. He curled his fingers around one of his hidden knives, contemplating if this deserved a stab. Not yet, he decided. Let Thor tire himself out first. Get revenge when he least expects it. Though, Thor never expected revenge. He fell for Loki's tricks every time. 

"I am Groot," Thor teased, putting an arm around Loki to prove his words. 

"Wha—Hey! Unhand me, you oaf!" Loki protested, pushing his brother away.

Thor chuckled. "I am Groot." 

"Yes, brother, I heard you the first time." Loki sighed, shaking his head. "The nerve of some people," he muttered to himself. "All up in your face, with there 'I's and 'am's and 'Groot's. Do they never rest?!" 

Thor rolled his eyes. "I am Groot." 

"Am I going to have to call for a tutor? You know I can't understand you, right? I haven't taken Groot yet and I probably never will. Oh, I suppose this is just like talking to myself, since I can't understand you. You're just like a dog." 

"I am Groot?" 

"...If you're asking if I meant that you're adorable and I enjoy your hugs, _no_. I meant that you smell bad and don't listen to me." 

Thor gasped. "I am Groot?!" 

"Oh, and your hair is bad too." 

Thor pouted, crossing his arms. "I am Groot."

"Yes, I know you're proud of your hair." Loki was just guessing what Thor was saying by now. Maybe that was all Groot was. "But seriously? Long hair? That has to be impractical for battle, and besides, you don't have the face shape for it. Your cheeks are all round and stuff, you look like a pumpkin. But yellow. A yellow pumpkin. Seriously, Thor, you're nearly an adult. Why do you still have the face of an infant? I'm younger than you but I look older! That shouldn't be allowed."

Thor sighed. "I am Groot." 

"Yes, you're right, I _would_ look absolutely dashing with long hair." 

"I am Groot!" 

"Would too!" 

"I am Groot." 

"Would too." 

"I AM GROOT!!!"

"WOULD TOO!!!" 

Thor shook his head. "I am Groot." 

"Yeah, well you're a pumpkin, so shush." 

"I am Groot!" 

"Well, maybe Groot's a pumpkin. Did you consider that? No? Okay then." Loki was getting increasingly annoyed by his brother's antics, and tried to calm down. "Perhaps it is time to take a break from the Groot." 

"I am Groot," Thor said simply. 

"That wasn't a suggestion," Loki said. 

"I am Groot," Thor said mockingly. 

" _Rude_." 

"I am Groot." 

"Thor, _please_ , just speak normally!" 

Thor shook his head. "I am Groot." 

"I have had enough of this, brother!" Loki shouted, whipping out his dagger and stabbing Thor. 

"Hey! What was that for?!" Thor shouted, finally speaking normally. 

Loki grinned wickedly. " _I am Groot_."

Thor looked confused. "You stabbed me because there's a bilgesnipe under Father's sink?"

"... _What_?"


End file.
